If I had a dollar for every time a handyman asked to speak to my husband, I’d be sipping rosé in my manicured Monaco garden instead of dodging raccoons on my Toronto patio.
Apparently, if you have a penis, you automatically understand construction. Just like having a vagina makes you an excellent cook. It's biology—or at least that's the vibe.
I’ve had contractors look me straight in the eye—after I explained exactly what I wanted—and reply: “Let me talk to your husband.”
I’m not going to lie: I’ve used this misogyny to my advantage, leaving it to my poor husband to deal with the testosterone and bad syntax. Everyone plays to their strengths.
I often wonder how they handle single women or Queer. Do they ask to speak to their dads? Their imaginary husbands? The nearest available man?
But beyond the baseline misogyny, I suspect there are a few additional reasons behind the all-too-common “Let me talk to your husband.”
đź’¸ Men: Excellent Targets for Upsells
In my early days in Toronto, I was a member of WCM and attended a mentor lunch with Sherry Cooper, who at the time was the Chief Economist at BMO.
She shared a funny (and painfully relatable) story:
She and her husband were selling their house and had a handyman come in to freshen the carpets. She was away. He was home. The contractor saw his chance—and upsold him to the Rolls Royce of carpet cleaning.
When the invoice arrived, Sherry asked: “Why the deluxe package on a house we’re leaving in two weeks?”
He shrugged. “I don’t know. He offered it. I said yes.”
Women are used to being pushed, so we develop little antennas to detect BS.
Men? Not so much.
Also, we tend to make less money, so price tags and pressure tactics actually register.
Survival of the fittest, Baby!
âť“ Ask Me Anything (Unless You're a Man at Home Depot)
As women we have been underestimated our whole lives, so we’re generally okay not knowing everything. We ask questions. We admit when we don’t know. The bar’s already low—what’s the worst that could happen?
Men, on the other hand, have a position to protect.
God forbid they look clueless—especially about “manly” things like drywall or wiring. The shame! The silence! The overcompensation!
Years ago, I read that the profession most easily conned is… doctors.
Why? Because they can’t admit they don’t know something. They don’t ask questions. And so—easy prey.
👩‍⚖️ So Does That Make Me a Karen?
Maybe.
But first I hate that word. For me, it’s just another tool in the misogyny toolbox—a way to shame women into silence, into compliance, into paying for something they don’t need.
If refusing to be gaslit, upsold, or ignored makes me a Karen, then fine. Pass me the name tag.
And honestly? The Karens I know are fabulous—smart, sharp, and unwilling to be taken for a ride.
So next time you hear “Let me talk to your husband”, be ready for your nice but firm retort
Peggy Van de Plassche is an Operating Partner in Private Equity with over 20 years of experience across financial services, healthcare, and technology. She partners with investment firms, boards, and portfolio company leadership to accelerate performance, drive operational transformation, and unlock long-term value.
Peggy specializes in executing complex value creation plans—from capital allocation and digital enablement to transaction advisory and leadership alignment. Her work bridges strategy and implementation, helping investors and operators boost EBITDA and maximize enterprise value.
A founding board member of Invest in Canada, Peggy also brings deep expertise in institutional capital deployment and public-private partnerships—critical levers for competitive advantage in today’s global landscape.
Her clients have included BMO, CI Financial, HOOPP, OMERS, GreenShield Canada, Nicola Wealth, and Power Financial.
Learn more at peggyvandeplassche.com.